Thursday, December 9, 2010
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
- Define clearly what the needs to be done. If the tasks are not clearly and properly instructed, then that would lead to procrastination as they are not sure of what exactly you expect. Ask you child if he understand what you want to be done, if not then clearly explain it to him and clarify him if there are any confusions in his mind.
- Motivation. A child can easily perform something if he is motivated to do that is important to him. That is why you need to discuss and set some privileges or incentives he could get based on completed responsibilities.
- Help your child set goals. Goals should come from them but make sure they are clear. These goals serve as their guide to have their work done and not to procrastinate.
- Use preventive measures and deal the problem before it will happen. Perfectionism and anxiety can cause your child to become stressed which lead to procrastinate. Talk to your child that they don’t need to be perfect in every task but doing and showing their best is already an achievement of the task given to them.
- Understanding and Support are Very Important. Sometimes children procrastinate because they are afraid of what would happen or they are hesitant to perform the task. The best that your can give to them is your understanding and talk to them or have a role playing of the task if necessary. This will give them the idea on what to do.
Friday, November 12, 2010
I would like to share this story to everyone. I got this from a forwarded email of my friend. The story is so touching and hope it will change some of our lives and how we deal with people.
One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry.
He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.
Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water! . She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it so slowly, and then asked, How much do I owe you?"
You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness."
He said ... "Then I thank you from my heart."
As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.
Many year's later that same young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease.
Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes.
Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room.
Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once.
He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to her case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won.
Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for sh e was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words ...
"Paid in full with one glas s of milk"
(Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank You,
God, that Your love has spread broad through human hearts and hands."
There's a saying which goes something like this: Bread cast on the waters comes back to you. The good deed you do today may benefit you or someone you love at the least expected time. If you never see the deed again at least you will have made the world a better place - And, after all, isn't that what life is all about?
Friday, October 29, 2010
Halloween is a secular holiday combining vestiges of traditional harvest festival celebrations with customs more peculiar to the occasion such as costume wearing, trick-or-treating, pranksterism, and decorations based on imagery of death and the supernatural. The observance takes place on October 31. Halloween was originated in the early Middle Ages as a Catholic vigil observed on the eve of All Saints Day (also known as "All Hallows Day"), November 1.
Though it was regarded up until the last few decades of the 20th century as a holiday primarily for children, in more recent years Halloween activities such as mask wearing, costume parties, themed decorations, and even trick-or-treating have grown popular with adults as well.
For us Filipinos, we are not so particular in holding Halloween party. We give importance in celebrating the All Saints Day and All Souls Day wherein people are going to the cemetery and offer prayers to the dead love ones and friends.
Friday, October 22, 2010
A month ago, I was invited by my friend to accompany him in playing casino. Since it was my first time to be entering to that place I grabbed the chanced of going with him. I was so amazed with the place because there were a lot of machines for different type of games. He told me to try playing the slots machine. First I was hesitant because I do not know how to play it. Though I did not win the game but I enjoyed playing it. The experienced was so addicting that I wanted to play again. Until I found out that there is lots of best casino game online. It is more favorable because I can play it at home at my convenient time, which I can choose a wide range of fun and exciting casino games. So, if you’re looking for the best online casino portal? Choose bestonlinecasino.org. They will give you the best and excellent services you want. Enjoy playing!
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Some children throw tantrums and some never do. I wonder why they are behaving that way. Children throw tantrums as a way of expressing anger and frustration especially if behavior is dealt incorrectly, then the child may learn to use tantrums to manipulate people and to gain attention. When dealing tantrums, it is good to know the ultimate goal, which is to teach the child the acceptable way of expressing his anger.
How to survive tantrums of a child? Below are tips in dealing tantrums.
1. Don’t punish the child.
2. Don’t reward the child.
3. Stay calm and ignore the behavior to the extent as possible.
4. Keep the child safe.
5. Isolate the child if possible.
6. Don’t let the disapproval of other people affect your response to the tantrum.
When the child throws tantrum at home, calmly carry her to a place where she can be left by herself, such as a crib or playpen. Leave him inside the room and don’t go back until he calms down. When he calms down, talk to him regarding his behavior. If he doesn’t want you to leave the room, you can stay with but don’t respond to the tantrum in any way. Punishing your child for throwing tantrum, example by spanking, yelling makes the tantrum worse in the short term and can only prolongs the behavior. Just give your unending patient and understanding to your child so that you can help him stop the behavior.
We traveled a lot everyday either through private or public utility vehicle. That is why every vehicle owners are encouraged or obligated to get car insurance. Because we never know what happened ahead of us while on the road to our destination. It is just giving the importance of your car and the riders. As we can see on television everyday, that there are a lot of accidents happening anywhere in the world.
Just like any other insurance, it is important to know first the financial strength of the company. Because there are a lot of insurance firms offering a lower rate of premiums but when it comes to service they are not giving it satisfactorily to their clients. So, if you have problems looking for the right insurance for your car, CarinsuranceRates.com is the answer. They are a definite online source for securing car insurance. They provide good services to their clients when it comes to claims, coverage, insurance policies, and premiums. They offer a low rate insurance premiums but with the best value that you can get. With CarinsuranceRates.com, all of their insurance providers are stable and has the capacity to do all their obligations to their clientele. So what are you waiting for, fill up their online forms and get quoted. Insuring your car is likewise insuring your life.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Life is full of mysteries. Sometimes you are happy, but sometimes you are at the lowest point in your life. Life is like a wheel wherein you cannot choose to stay always on top; you have to experienced being down. That is why it is important to always be prepared whatever that comes on our way while living here on earth. The best way of preparation is get a whole life insurance. You will then ask why it is important. Anyway I will not be enjoying it while I’m still alive, which is most of the comment I’ve heard. But they are certainly wrong in their perception of life insurance. For a deeper view of life insurance, it is giving a 100% assurance of financial security for your love ones who can still be living in a comfortable life even without your presence. That is the benefits that they could get. So don’t be too selfish enough to give your family a comfortable life, a good school for your children which in other way you can have peace of mind. There is no worry about getting an insurance policy because there is already an insurance company who can give you the best service that you want in a very affordable rate without breaking your budget. They offer an online sign up. Just fill up the form and in a short moment they will give you the four quotes on life insurance rates base on the information you give. Sign up now! And get your family secure.
It is really annoying and frustrating to see your 5 year old child squirming, kicking, screaming and crying on the floor. I don’t know why he is acting that way especially when I’m at home. He wants to get my attention which is I always show and give it to him. Is there any wrong with my parenting style? However, according to experts that tantrum is normal and is not reflection of bad parenting. They are indications that your toddler trusts you so much that he expects you to read his mind and know every feeling and desire he has. Below are some of the tips to calm down his feelings and stop form crying.
· Try to understand what disappoint the child. If you're busy go to a quiet place where they can vent and calm down. Sit down with him and listen to what they are saying.
· Use distraction. You can use his toy, television show or a favorite book to refocus his attention and stop the tantrum before it starts.
· Explain why his request is not possible. If the toddler throws a tantrum because she wants something, then give him reasons why it is not possible and discuss to him the effect of doing so.
· Take the child seriously. If the request is ignored or blown off, this will just escalate the toddler's tantrum.
· Make sure he's getting enough sleep and isn't hungry. Toddler tantrums abound when they're tired or they missed a snack.
· Let her throw her fit. Leave the room if the toddler is throwing the tantrum to get attention. By not rewarding him with your attention, eventually she will find other ways to interact.
The first half of the year in school is over. Most of the college students are on their semestral vacation. Some went home to spend time with their families; some are spending vacation to some places just to relax, while others are looking for a short time job so that they can have money to be used for the enrollment of the next semester.
The enrollment for the second semester is already set on the last week of October and most of the parents are already preparing money for the enrollment of their children. While other parents are prepared for the coming the second semester others are still looking for financial institutions to avail some loans. Well, there is good news because there is already a lending institution offering a faxless payday loan which is online. What’s this Easy Online Payday Loan all about? How and who can avail this kind of loan? Just like other loans, payday loan is a short term loan or shall we call it as an emergency loan which is use for some unexpected expenses or in some cases for the enrollment of their children especially when there is shortage of the budget. It is protected against your payday check or salaries for the month. The requirements of the company in order to avail the said loan are; at least 18 years of age with regular or stable source of income and with a bank account in their locality. So if you have all these requirements needed, you are on your way to get the cash you need. So get started now!
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Adults need eight full hours of sleep and teens need nine hours and 15 minutes says John Shepard, Jr. M.D. However the average person only gets seven hours and 25 minutes of sleep per night.
So you don't have to count sheep in order to sleep, by following the 10 tips for better sleep you can have a restful sleep during the night. Just try one or two or a combination until you have enough and quality sleep to feel alert and rested during the night.
1. Stick to a schedule and don't sleep late on weekends. Don't sleep late on Saturday and Sunday you'll get a Sunday night insomnia. Instead, go to bed and get up at the same time every day. Don't rely on the alarm clock to wake you up when you get enough sleep.
2. Don't eat or drink a lot before bedtime. Eat only light dinner two hours before sleeping. And also do not drink too much liquid before sleeping you'll wake up repeatedly in the night to go to the bathroom. Don't eat spicy or fatty foods. These foods will cause heartburn. Avoid eating midnight snacks. Don't drink alcohol near bedtime. It will cause you to snore or develop sleep apnea.
3. Avoid caffeine and nicotine. They will keep you awake because of the additive stimulants present in these food and cigarette.
4. Exercise. For a better sleep, the best time to exercise is in the afternoon. It enhances the deep and refreshing stage of sleep.
5. A slightly cool room is ideal for sleeping. Try to sleep in warmer night clothes and wear socks if your room is cold. Use also blankets. If it's hot at night wear light night clothes and sleep under a single sheet.
6. Sleep only at night. Daytime naps steal hours from nighttime slumber. Limit daytime sleep up to 20 minutes. if you work in the nights, keep window curtains closed so that you will not be bothered by the rays of the sunlight. If you have a day job and sleep at night, leave the window curtains open and let the sun's light wake you up.
7. Keep it quiet. silence is more conducive to sleep. Turn off the radio and tv. You can use earplugs to mask sound that you cannot control such as a snoring partner, busy street, vehicles blowing horns, etc.
8. Make your bed. Make sure you have a comfortable bed that offers a good night sleep. Go to bed when your tired and turn out the lights. do not agonize about falling asleep, stress will only prevent from sleeping.
9. soak and sack out. Taking a hot shower or bath before bed helps bring on sleep because they can relax the tense muscles.
10. Don't rely on sleeping pills. Check with your doctor before taking any medicine for sleeping.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Playing online games is fun and easy. There are lot of online games to choose from, and one of which is the online casino reviews. Unlike the typical casino game which you need to go out from your house just to play, online casino is played at the comfort of your own home at your convenient time. First time players need not to worry because they provide guidelines on how to play. They also offer a no deposit requirement to their players , so you can still play and try your luck to win the game. That is how good casinoonline.org to their players.So try your luck now and play the online casino games.
Monday, October 4, 2010
What makes a Person Shy?
There are a host of variables that work together to make one shy. Some of the most common factors are the following:
* a disfiguring problem
* speech or language problems
* abuse as a child
* being raised by very nervous parents
* a traumatic situation
* abusive adults
* relocation at a young age
* an embarrassing situation
Not only there are environmental causes of shyness; increasingly, scientific evidence points to a strong genetic predisposition to shyness, just as you may inherit a tendency toward diabetes, heart disease or obesity. Study shows that babies wore caps with sensors that detected the brain's electrical activity. Babies later found to be shy had more activity in their frontal lobes than in their left. Babies who were more "uninhibited" had the opposite pattern of brain waves.
All Introverts are Shy? - FALSE
While many shy people are introverts, introversion and shyness are two very different personality classifications. First introverts prefer solitary, nonsocial activities and settings. Shy people may also prefer to be alone but they go one step beyond and fear social encounters, unlike a "pure" introvert. Extroverts or those who prefer socially engaging activities and settings can be shy. However, generally speaking, if an extrovert is shy it is in a private setting with negative thoughts about self.
Friday, September 24, 2010
When there are so strict parents, there are also parents who are too lax when it comes to child discipline. Relax parents are simply get rid off all the rules they implemented. They have all the rules set in the family but when time comes for imposing it they deviate or simply not doing it. The effects of inconsistent child discipline or a lack of any child discipline can create problems for the child that is just as bad as having too many rules. Children may feel insecure or will develop anxiety or stress when there is lack of consistent guidance. Children who do not boundaries of their actions while they are young may experience difficulty with self-control in the later part of their life. This may lead to social problems and relationship issues as they will appear to be self-centered and they are expecting to get their way at all times, never compromising with others. A very relax parents teaches a child to be passive-aggressive behavior. Parents who are too permissive send a message that they don’t care and this “I don’t care” attitude which often transfers tot eh child. They feel that they are above the law and do not consider the needs of others. That is why what may seem to be working at home in your child’s early years can turn into disappointment and disillusionment when he’s older and starts to experience the laws and some limits in the outside world like in school.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
To be a parent is a very tough and hard job. It requires patience and understanding. It is a job that nobody can achieve to be perfect especially in terms of discipline. When parents practice child discipline that is too harsh, children can get the message of having no freedom. Some will feel that they have no control over their lives. Some children may question the arbitrary nature of their parents' rules and become distrustful of parents and other authority figures. Eventually, the child may not trust a mature adult enough to seek advice when they are grappling with important issues. In the toddler years this may not seem so important, but if years of heavy handed control prevent your teen from talking to you about sex, relationships or drugs, the consequences of his misguided actions at that point will be difficult to reverse. Strict child discipline can also exploit a child's emotional development if he is not permitted to make mistakes and learn from them. Keeping such a tight control on a child that he is never allowed to fail prevents him from experiencing life's natural consequences. Those consequences are responsible for him to grow mature over the years. That is why it is better for him to experience these consequences as a child than to deny him which could lead to extreme risk taking when he's older. In addition, parents who are too strict will present children a poor adult role model. This is especially true if the strict discipline comes from an adult who makes instant judgments, doesn't take the time to look at the big picture, desires instant gratification, has an inability to cope with anxiety or cannot control her own emotional reactivity. Children also need adult role models who offer a more balanced approach to problem solving and those adults should be able to do so in a calm and controlled manner.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Eid il-Fitr is a Muslim holiday that marks the end of Ramadan. It is an Islamic holy month of fasting. Eid is an Arabic word which means "festivity", while Fitr means "conclusion of the feast" and so the holiday celebrates the conclusion of the thirty days of dawn to sunset fasting during the entire month of Ramadan.
So, to our Muslim brothers and sisters, Happy Feast Day!
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
I really find it hard motivating and teaching my kindergarten son to write. He seems not interested in writing. He will always say he doesn’t know every time I taught him on how to write the letters in the alphabet. But I am hoping that he will develop the soonest his interest in writing because writing comes naturally to children. That is why I did some researched on how to motivate children how to write which I hope will be applicable to my son.
1. Keep the pressure off – Give your child every opportunity to put pen to paper, chalk to sidewalk, paint to easel and marker to poster but make sure it’s all in fun. Preschoolers are just beginning to understand how words are used to convey thoughts and they are still developing the fine motor skills needed to form letters. As parents we need to encourage them in order for them to realize that writing is an activity with its own unique rewards.
2. Experiment with writing tools – Let him try the different types of writing tools like crayons, chalks, pens, pencils but be sure not on your wall. Remember that they are more at ease using fat pencils or crayons than skinny ones. Let him choose the writing tools which will make them comfortable while writing.
3. Experiment with surfaces – For beginners, try using white papers, big pads of newsprint will also do because children love to work in a big surface.
4. Model good writing habits – Be a model to your child. Let your child see you writing on a daily basis- like writing letters, to do list or keeping a journal. Always remember that children are big copycats. They will follow every movement that they see in you. So be enthusiastic so that children will get the chance to follow you.
5. Use the computer – If you have computer at home let your child compose words on the computer. Let her click the letters on the keyboard until she can form words or phrases that convey thoughts.
6. Be enthusiastic – Show interest and admiration to every output your child does even if it just looks not so good. Always say compliment words to every achievement he made. Saying like “You’re really learning how to write your name”. This will encourage your child to practice more and do better output next time.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Spanking is not really what parents want to do to their children but it happens because of most parents are desperate of the behavior of their children. But there are alternatives ways to handle this.
1. Be firm and be kind.
A child is more likely to hear what you're saying if you use a neutral tone.
There's nothing wrong with saying, "I'm too angry to deal with this now. We'll talk about it later."
3. Teach your kids.
Instead of punishing a child for misbehaving, think in terms of teaching him to behave.
4. Be positive.
Instead of saying, "How many times do I need to ask you to brush your teeth?" Say, "Go brush your teeth and let me know when you’re done."
5. Give explanations, not threats.
By giving your child a brief explanation of why she needs to do as she's told, you give her a reason to behave.
6. Refuse to get angry.
Instead of focusing on your child's misbehavior and working yourself into a lather, think of each conflict as an opportunity to guide and direct your child.
7. Give incentives.
Inspire your child to cooperate by giving them incentives or rewards.
8. Be flexible.
If your little one asks, "Can I just finish watching this show before we go?" be reasonable. If you have the time to spare, make room for your child's requests. This is a great way for kids to learn about the art of negotiation.
9. Drop out of power struggles.
Nothing is as frustrating or less productive as having a showdown with your little one. If he keeps on insisting or not cooperating for something which you don’t like, leave it to him to find a solution.
10. Be smart.
Parents will often deal with problems in a set manner, even if their approach isn't helping. If what you're doing isn't working, find a more helpful way to handle the problem. Remember! It's much easier to change your approach than to change your child. Always ask yourself, "What can I do differently that will inspire a better reaction from my child?"
Remember these three important rules about punishment:
- Don't assign a punishment when you're angry
- Don't use punishment as revenge.
- A more severe punishment is not necessarily a better one
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Can parents tell if a child feels rejected? Yes. Fear of failure and criticism will dominate a child’s emotions. Accusation and reproach will cause him to justify his existence by creating arguments for his own defense. Such fear and uncertainty exhaust a child emotionally and drain him physically. Below are some of the signs and characteristics of a rejected child.
1. Lacks of decision-making ability.
a. Hesitates to make even minor decisions.
b. Fears to try new things even when help is offered.
c. When asked to do something says, “I don’t know how”
d. Will not ask for things he needs.
2. Withdrawal or retreat o fantasy
a. Does not easily participate with others in games or activities
b. Does not initiate contact with others
c. Does not defend self by words or actions
d. Is afraid to ask or answer questions
e. Only answers direct questions
f. Displays a cool or non-affectionate attitude
g. Spends an abnormal amount of time by self
h. Spends an abnormal amount of time watching television or reading
i. Prefers make-believe friends to real friends.
3. Repeated deliberate misbehavior
a. Bites, hits, kicks, etc. excessively
b. Habitually lies or steals
c. Hurts self or others
d. Seeks attention by doing something forbidden
e. Continually acts foolishly or disturbs others
f. Displays extreme competition with other children
4. Abnormal attempts to please
a. Constantly “gives” things to people in attempts to “buy” affection or friendship
b. Brings things from home to get teacher’s and friends’ approval
c. Constantly asks, “Do you like me?”
5. Habitual easy crying
a. Cries or pouts or creates a scene when doesn’t get own way
b. Complains “They don’t like me” or They won’t play with me”
c. Shows fear when being left with a babysitter, new person or teacher
a. Wets the bed
b. Bangs head
c. Bites nails
e. Carries a blanket, comforter or same toy everywhere
7. Puts self and others down
a. Calls others like “baby” or stupid”
b. Is critical and judgmental of others
c. Blames others for own mistakes
d. Finds excuses for own behavior
e. Habitually tells tales
f. Says things like “I’m better that you are”
8. Physical characteristics
a. Is grossly overweight
b. Speaks in weak, uncertain voice
c. Is careless and sloppy in appearance
d. Has sagging posture
e. Has a sharply turned-down mouth and eyes that lack luster
f. Looks unhappy
g. Avoids meeting another’s direct gaze
Monday, August 2, 2010
Kids hum for a variety of reasons. This can be to wear you down, to make you feel guilty, for reassurance and out of pure habit. Whatever the reason, humming is unattractive at best. It creates an atmosphere of nosiness inside the house and suddenly makes yourself upset and mad against your child because of continuous humming.
The word STOP, will help remind you how to respond rather than react to your child's humming:
S - slow down your reaction time. Don't answer complaints until you feel cool.
T - take responsibility for your end of the equation. Ask yourself, "What is it I am doing either positively or negatively that is causes your child's tendency to hum?"
O - one-liners should be prepared in advance. Statement like: "I will discuss this with you once you ask me without humming."
P - plan ahead. For instance, I have a tendency to give in because I feel guilty when I say no to my kids. To help me be firm, I remind myself that it's in my kids' best interest to hear the word no.
Humming can sometimes losses your patience but I would suggest to study the behavior of your child and once you know him well you can easily deal with it or ask him question like: "How can I help you stop humming?" Remember, habits are hard to break, and it will take creative planning, confidence in your little one's ability to make positive changes and time before any progress is made. To end humming is only part of the problem. At the same time we need to teach our kids more effective ways of communicating with us and with others.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Do you have trouble with your teens when it comes to doing their homework? Homework in high school is not was it was when they were in grade school. It could be something you have never studied and don’t know enough about to help your teen, or it could be a long drawn out project that takes your teen an entire semester to complete. Whatever it is, there will be times that parents can’t really help their teen in the ‘traditional’ sense of sitting with them and going over the answers. You and your teen will need a few different skills to solve the problem, try these:
• Know where to find usable resources. As soon as your teen knows his/her schedule, look up websites that can help in a crunch. Local college libraries are perfect resources for high school Advanced Placement students and normally offer cards for local residents.
• Write down the times the teacher is available for extra help and encourage your teen get it when it is needed.
• Work on your teens organizational skills..
• Encourage your teen by being there for him/her. You do not need to know what his/her vocabulary means to be able to look at the answer sheet and quiz your teen. This one-on-one time means a lot.
• Hire a tutor. There is no shame in getting some professional help, especially if it works and if you don’t have enough time to study your teens because of your work.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Do you know that there are many parents who are rejecting their own kids for varied reasons? Below are some of the reasons.
- Wrong Timing. Many children is rejected, not accepted, not appreciated or loved as he needs to be simple because he came at the wrong time. When a child comes at the wrong time, it can lead the parents unconsciously to reject him.
- Disappointment over the Sex of the Child. This happens for first born baby especially when the father wanted to have a baby boy but fortunately it was a baby girl. Problems arise when there is a crossover of roles. If these roles becomes uncertain of his sexual identification. He will ask himself, “What I am supposed to be?
- Extra Responsibility. Some couples are so emotionally immature that they are totally unprepared for the responsibility of parenthood. Other parents are so busy doing their own thing that they have little time left over for their offspring.
- Unrealistic Expectations. Many parents are secretly disappointed because their child is so average. And they had hoped for a child with unlimited personality and talent.
- Extended family attitudes. In some families, extended family members bring pressure on parents either to have children or not to have children; when to have them and how to have them; how to train and how not to train them. It is said that grandparents or other members of the extended family can be a marvelous asset to the family. But at the same time, parents must not allow grandparents to take over child rearing.
- Social Pressure. Other parents are deeply concerned about universal hunger, over population or the end of time. A parent who accepts such ideals could reject a child. Selfishness is the root of all sin, unhappiness, marital discord and broken families. As we work at being better parents and spouses, we shall mature and lay aside our selfish desires by living for the good of others.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Most feelings of inadequacy can be traced to unfortunate childhood experiences. Parents are frequently unaware of the effect of their words and actions, yet it all either builds or destroys self-worth.
A critical parent arouses in his child feelings of rejection. Yelling, screaming and constant criticism tell a child that you do not love him or care about his feelings.
Parents with low self-esteem particularly have a compulsive need to find fault with everything a child does. Soon the child feels that it is impossible to please this parent or to measure up to expectations. If the child receives additional censure and condemnation at school from teachers and peers, the blow is even more devastating. Take note that feelings of unacceptance do not always have to be verbalized to be experienced. A lack of appreciation or recognition speaks as loudly to a child as if it were verbally announced. Whether spoken or unspoken, criticism is by far the most common and destructive cause of low self-esteem.
An adults domineering or bossy attitude implies to the child that he isn’t capable of completing an assigned task unless his parent is there to supervise. A parent spends musch time in telling a child what to do, when and how to do it. Authoritarian parents waken the sel-worth of a child. A child who is constantly told what to do develops few inner controls and lacks faith in his own abilities to carry out tasks by himself. A child needs training and guidance, but not in an overbearing manner.
Over protectiveness or excessive sheltering can also make a child feel rejected because he never has an opportunity to make decisions for himself. During the very early years of a child’s life you can control his environment but from the age of 3 or up when he began interacting with others, neighbors, friends, schoolmates, it may tear your insides out to have your child laughed at, called names or even ignored. Your first reaction may be to hold him close- shielding, defending or smothering him. But such approach would only inhibit your child’s progress. His emotional growth will be strengthened by learning to cope with small problems. A mother who fights all the neighborhood battles in order to protect his child from the cruel world inhibits his progress towards a positive self-image. Parents are advised to spend more time with a child, yet it is not quantity but quality time that is important.
A parent will show rejection through lack of interest. Furthermore, our attitudes of acceptance or rejection vary along with our moods. Some parents are more accepting and loving than others by virtue of their emotional make-up. Our accepting and rejecting attitudes also depend on where we are who is watching. Most of us tend to be less accepting at a friends’ home in a restaurant or at church. And when friends visit our homes, we may get upset over manners that we would accept at other times. Many of us fall innocently into some of these traps. We love our child but in a day to day struggle we tend to lost it.
The key therefore is the ability to accept the child at all times, while perhaps not accepting everything he does. Just as God hates sin but loves the sinner. So as parents you should differentiate between the child’s behavior and the child himself, if you want to build a positive self-image.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
For a better, more regular energy boost, people should make healthy eating part of an everyday lifestyle. The best snacks are a combination of protein and carbohydrates not just a piece of candy bars.
We are often led to a run-down feeling by a high carbohydrate snack that will increase our blood sugar and give us that quick boost of energy, but then we drop down after that. For the most part, we are going to get more benefit from a piece of fruit or half of a peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat bread with a banana or raisins, instead of snacks that are high in sugar and fat.
Parents should also realize that children’s energy needs vary, not only with the weather, but with occasional growth spurts. Parents should listen to kids’ requests for snacks. They should plan for snacks. Make sure when kids are asking for snacks, nutritious ones are available. If you don’t prepare for snacks, kids may eat what you don’t want them to. There should be a place where high-quality snacks can be found, such as a bowl on the cabinet, or a basket in the refrigerator. Easy snacks that work well include bananas or other fresh fruit, graham crackers and yogurt cups.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Parents cannot constrain themselves to their teenager and supervise every decision he makes throughout his adolescence. Parents want their teenagers to know when and how to protect themselves against negative peer pressure, teen drug use, bad grades in school, and other social problems. They want them to learn how to grab their own boot straps and pick themselves up. This is called teaching resiliency. There are five factors contributing resilient to teens.
1. A strong relationship with a parent or caring adult who takes a parenting role in the teen’s life. Teens need a good foundation that starts from the family. They need someone that is there for them with guidance and love.
2. A sense of accomplishment will make your teen feel capable. Once he has experienced this feeling, he’ll want it again.
3. Good communication and social skills are essentials to resiliency. Teens need to ask for what they need and explain the why’s without acting like they are going into battle. For this reason alone parents should learn not to buy into power struggles.
4. Problem solving skills give more than we think. Teaching your teen to make choices is one way of building his confidence whenever problems arise. Therefore, he’ll be able to think through the problem and find all of the choices he has to help solve it.
5. A supportive environment at school and community makes it easier to work on a problem if you know there is help down the road should you need it.
These five factors will help your teenager to become a resilient person. Though it may not happen overnight, but its worth to wait until he develops his ability to face the problems.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Jealousy is an emotion typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear and anxiety. This happens between siblings in the family. The baby of the family wants to be the center of attention and this can be the source of competition or rivalry between siblings. Jealousy can push the person to work harder and expect more of him but it can also wear a little one down and prevent him to show his best. Below are some tips on how to manage jealousy and bring harmonious relationship among the family and other people.
TIP ONE: Treat each child as a unique person instead of equals. Parents often think siblings need to be treated exactly the same. However, when parents try to give the exact same amount of love, time and attention, kids become suspicion instead of satisfied. A child may wonder, "Did I really get as good a present as my sister?" Or he may complain, "Mark always gets to sit on the big couch." It's better to think in terms of treating siblings as individuals rather than equals.
TIP TWO: Avoid comparisons at all costs. Don't ask, "Why can't you clean up your room like your brother?" Or, "Your sister gets straight A's -- why can't you at least get B's?" Parents can aggravate feelings of jealousy by holding one child up to the other. Although your intentions may be innocent, a child is likely to hear the message "You love Johnny more than me." Lifelong resentments and grudges are born from making comparisons.
TIP THREE: Nurture unique qualities in each child. Promote different interests so that each child excels in her own unique way. When a child's special talents are recognized, it sets him apart from his siblings and builds up his self-esteem.
TIP FOUR: Make spending time alone with each child a priority. Kids treasure these precious moments. Schedule these times so they remain a priority. I guarantee that years from now you won't look back with regret that you didn't spend more time in meetings. However, you may wish you'd spent more time with your kids.
TIP FIVE: Set clear boundaries. Kids need to learn to respect each other. That means the oldest should not be allowed to tease younger siblings, while the younger siblings should be taught not to hassle older ones. Bedrooms are private places, and siblings should ask for permission before entering. Parents should be impartial when kids squabble occur, otherwise bickering becomes a way to get parents attention.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Being a mother is not an easy task to handle especially when it comes to budgeting. And I think all the parents are longing only the best for their children. I remembered having a hard time looking for the best and suited kids backpack for my two children who are going to school this year. Because I wanted a good quality bag that will last for a long time or as much as possible would survive the whole school year. Thanks to
Posy Lane is also engage in making nap mat. It is also perfect for young children and toddlers. I can remember my daughter telling me that after eating their lunch, they are advised to take a nap, that is why I bought her a nap mat. She told me that she feels comfortable because it is padded and lined with nylon and cotton. Posy Lane has expanded their line of business and they produced variety of products for babies, toddlers, preschoolers and big kids. They also produced personalized items like plates, ink stamps and many other items you wish to order. They can be reach through online ordering which is so quick and easy. They will deliver the items from 1-3 business days from the time you place your order through UPS pickup. Hurry and visit their online store now.
Friday, July 2, 2010
"Today marks the end of a regime indifferent to the appeals of the people," Aquino said in one of many stinging criticisms of Gloria Arroyo, whose nearly 10 years in power were marred by allegations of vote rigging and massive graft.
"Through good governance in the coming years we will lessen our problems. The destiny of the Filipino will return to its rightful place and, as each year passes, the Filipino's problems will continue to lessen.""To those who are talking about reconciliation... we have this to say: There can be no reconciliation without justice," he said. (This line of his speech really struck me because it assures the Filipino people that he will run after those who committed sins against the people. and I hope he will be true to his words.)
Friday, June 25, 2010
I think everybody is very familiar with glutathione because Oxis International has developed a product containing this substance to enhance the beauty of each individual.
Visit their site and try to discover the variety of products because they only have penny stocks.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
How are opinions of self formed? What makes a child think about himself the way he does? Well, it all begins in the tender years of childhood. Most parents cannot stop with a plain “No” to a child when his behavior infringes on the rights of others. The typical parent feels that he must continue saying “No together with other words which is a bad thing to do. Sample of these words are: bad, slow, ugly, stupid, naughty, ridiculous, clumsy and thick will downgrade a child’s feelings of worth. Phrases such as, “You never do anything right, “I’m ashamed of you, or “What’s the matter with you? Are you stupid or something? The above statements will make a barrage of put-downs, along with non-verbal disrespect or emotional neglect, a child begins to grow up feeling ashamed of, and dissatisfied with, himself. The thoughts such as, “I’m no good or “I can never measure up to what my parents want from me” will begin to develop in his mind.
The origin of self-disrespect lies in childhood. Parents fail to render the support needed for feelings of adequacy to develop during the tender years. This has the potential of initiating a lifetime of self-castigation, self-recrimination self-unacceptability. Such feelings begin during the formative years and are nurtured by a performance-oriented society.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Most parents nowadays view the generation gap as inevitable, yet they recognize that good communication is basic to maintaining good discipline and to establish good values. They wanted to keep the channels of communication open and understandable to hose that have been clogged. But the question is how? Although there is no exact formula to use in order to patch up the gap every time it exist but there are principles and guidelines for parents to follow. First, it is important to establish what communication is, what it is not, and what a parent can expect from it. There parents who are confuse on verbal contact with communication. They think that if their lips or their child’s lips are moving, it is already communicating. But communication as defined by Webster, it is a two way conversation, the one who gives the information while the other receives the information by listening.
Most kids complain that no one ever listens to them, that no one understands how they feel, that they are nagged all the time. And most of the parents acted like sergeant barking many commands to their children.
Researchers have learned some techniques which can be use by parents to open up the clogged lines of communication. It must start with attitude which is called the attitude of “acceptance”. Acceptance enables a child to realize his potential, but acceptance must be demonstrated so that he can feel it. We can communicate our feelings and attitudes of acceptance to a child in so many ways. Many times the lines of communication between parent and child are severed because the child detects feelings of rejection. That is why the child will refrain from expressing his true feelings and thoughts to spare himself from pain. One way to convey your child of acceptance is by saying “I understand what you mean” or I say what you are saying”.
Another way of showing acceptance is Non-interference. It is shown by allowing the child to play or participate in activities without interrupting him because to interrupt a child because you want to give instructions, suggestions or offer assistance while he is engaged in an activity reveals your lack of trust in the abilities of the child. Therefore let him finished what he has started because meddling him while in the middle of the activities conveys un-acceptance. Though non-interference conveys acceptance, they both affect the self-worth of the child, either positively or negatively.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
The key word in active listening is acceptance- acceptance of your child’s feelings, ideas or opinions, in spite of how different they might be from how you want your child to respond to life. Active listening provides the basis for a relationship of trust and warmth.
Active listening does five specific things for the child.
- It helps the child learn how to handle negative feelings. Your acceptance of the child’s feelings will help him learn that negative emotions are a part of life and that he is not “bad” for having such feelings. It will also help him learn not to suppress his emotions but to seek an acceptable outlet to expel his feelings.
- It provides a basis for a close relationship between parent and child. I think everyone enjoys the feeling of being listened to and being understood by another person. This experience creates a bond of closeness that will draw respect, trust and togetherness between parent and child.
- It helps a child move towards independent problem solving. When a person is allowed or given the privilege talking aloud about his problem that he is facing, he can have clearer view about it. That is why it is good to seek an advice from a guidance counselor whenever there is a problem bothering you. Being able to verbalize in an atmosphere of complete acceptance and being able to use another person as a “sounding board” helps the person think more clearly and move towards a more acceptable solutions.
- It teaches a child to listen to a parent and to others. The earlier and more frequent you demonstrate to your child that you will listen to his ideas and problems, the more willing he will be to listen in return. If your feel that your child never listens to what you say, it might be that you are modeling this behavior to him. That is why you should be very careful in all your actions especially in front of a child because they will imitate every words and actions you did.
- It encourages a child to think for himself. Active listening encourages a youngster to think and to talk about problems, rather than run away from them. As parents we cannot follow all the days of our child, giving and offering them advice but it is our duty to equip them with the ability to deal and solve the problems of life.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
It’s back to school once again! It is the time wherein most of the parents spend so much for the enrollment of their children. Though you have already set aside a budget for this time but sometimes there are instances that the budget will not be enough because of the increase in tuition and rising up of the prices of school supplies. And also, if you are planning to put up a business or already in business and looking for an additional capital to expand your business. It is wise enough to seek for a lending company where you can avail for personal loans or business loan to sustain the needs. Good thing there is already a lending company wherein you can apply online or just give them a call to start the process of your loan. It is EZUnsecured.com. They offer several types of loans like Personal Loans, Unsecured Personal Loans, Unsecured Loans, and Business Loans. In EZUnsecured.com, they offer the shortest time for processing and you only have to wait about one to three days for the approval of your applied loan. What I like most at EZUnsecured.com is their credit lines features wherein they only charge you with 6% interest, no collateral, no business plans, no documents and they will grant you ranging from $10,000 to $250,000. Isn’t it amazing and very easy way of availing a loan! So don’t’ wait so much time looking for lending companies, try to visit their site or call them now.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Do you have eating problems with your child? Do you give in or give up in dealing such attitude of your child towards foods? Being a parent it is really necessary to think as many strategies to fight back the attitudes of our children. We should be very patient in dealing them and we need to study their manners so that we can think of a strategy and help them towards what is best. Below are some of the tips that will aid in helping your child eat regularly.
• Offer new foods at least twice a week, along with old favorites.
• Don't pressurerize your child to eat, but make it clear that you expect him to taste new foods. Spitting it out is ok.
• Offer desserts with nutritional value: such as pudding made with skim milk, fruit salad, a fruit and yogurt "sundae," whole-grain oatmeal cookies.
• Serve small, toddler-sized portions.
• Foods should be bite-size and easy to chew.
• Toddlers like colorful foods.
• Change the venue: serve lunch in the playhouse or have an afternoon tea party for snacks.
• Toddlers enjoy playing with their food. It is a part of learning about it, so, within reason, allow this to happen but you should monitor them as much as possible not to make their food wasted.
• Let them help in food preparation.
• Grow a vegetable garden.
• Make food attractive -- arrange it in the shape of an animal, a face, etc.
• Offer limited choices. Ask "Do you want orange juice or apple juice?" instead of "What do you want to drink?"
• Eat as a family as much as possible. Kids learn by imitating.
• Help ensure that they come to the table hungry.
• Don't use food to cure boredom or as a pacifier.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
As parents we should be very particular in giving healthy snacks to our children. It is because whatever we offer them to eat might affect their choices of food and that it will lead to loose of appetite that will lead to health problems. Below are some of the suggested snacks that we should give to our children. Don't just think of delicious foods but think of what healthy benefits they can get from ewating those foods.
- small boxes of favorite cereals
- boxes of raisins
- whole wheat, low-salt pretzels
- homemade mini-muffins (Keep a supply in your freezer.)
- peanut butter crackers (Make sandwiches out of whole grain crackers and natural peanut butter.)
- mini-whole grain bagels
- cheese cubes
- rice cakes
- small juice boxes
- whole grain granola bars
- ziplock bags of gorp (Let him decide what to mix in!)
Friday, May 28, 2010
It’s back to school again! It is the most exciting moment to all school age children. Though for some children like the pre-schooler, it is the terrifying moment because they will be away from their parents for a longer hour. All of these are normal feelings and sooner they will be able to adjust and cope up especially when they will be able to make friends at school. As parents we can help and guide them towards developing healthy and happy friendships.
- Be a good role model. Show him how much you value your friends, and what you give and get from each other. Try to play games with your child that shows sharing, patience emphasizes honesty and loyalty and other important skills for making friends.
- Encourage -- but don’t push. If your child is shy, especially in new situations, give him some time to socialize at his pace. Develop in him/her self confidence so that he/she can show to other people his capacity.
- Get him into a sport or favorite activity. Doing things outside of school -- like playing soccer or taking a pottery class or mingle with other kids in the neighborhood.
- Entice him into new relationships. Having a best friend is great, but if he only wants to play with one person all the time, tries to broaden his horizons. Explain to him that while it’s nice to have a best friend, that doesn’t mean he can’t also hang out with other kids, too. This will also give him the chance to discover new ideas and behavior and he can be able to distinguish the good and bad traits.
- Set up some after-school time with kids of the opposite gender. It was inevitable, I suppose. But being friends with a child of the opposite gender can help your child stay well-rounded.
- Balance friend-time with alone time. Watch your child’s moods and don’t overfill his social calendar.
- Respect his style. You may be a social butterfly who needs people around constantly to feel energized. But if your child does better in one-on-one settings or likes be alone occasionally, give him what he needs.
- Watch him interact with other kids. You can learn a lot about your child by observing him as he socializes with peers. This can be particularly helpful if your young child seems to be having trouble making friends. Watch his behavior -- is he bossy? Aggressive? Does he have trouble sharing, or have a meltdown when a playmate beats him at a game? Then work on some positive skills for building friendships. Keep on reminding your child not to be a troublemaker.
These are some simple tips to consider in helping and guiding your child in making friends in a happy way.