Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Disciplining a Child without Yelling

Disciplining a child is a great challenge for every parent. Sometimes you cannot control your temper and you are most likely to yell at our kids especially when we think they are not listening to us. However this doesn’t have to be the basis. Here are some ways to discipline a child without yelling or ending up in a screaming match.

1. Decide what you want your child to learn. Disciplining really means “teaching” Figure out what you want your child to know such as particular skills, character values and societal rules.
2. Take into account the age, temperament and personality. All children are different even those in the same family. The discipline techniques you apply to one child may not work to the other siblings.
3. Create a discipline plan. Write down unacceptable behaviors and apply a consequence to each. Make the consequence appropriate for the offense.
4. Discuss the plan with your child, if she’s old enough to give you her input. Find out what she thinks is fair and unfair about the plan and explain how and why you came up with those rules and consequences.
5. Acknowledge good behavior. Discuss this part of the discipline with your child too.
6. Don’t get upset over every little infraction. Learn to ignore some of your child’s misbehaviors.
7. Keep communication open. Talk with your child about why she chose to break the rule or why she won’t comply with your instructions. Suggest ways so you can both compromise.
8. Be flexible with your discipline. As your child grows up, you will need to make changes to the plan to reflect her age and circumstances.
9. Make your plan unique. If you have more than one child, create an individual discipline plan for each child.
10. Forgive yourself if you mess up. We’re human and we all yell at our children at some point in their lives. Don’t abandon all your hard work over one mistake, make adjustments if necessary and try doing it again.
11. Always respect your child. Even if you are disciplining her, make sure she knows that you love and respect her.


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